When Trust is Broken

Trust is an empowering dynamic to relationships and organizations. Trusting people commit wholeheartedly to a person or a cause. Trusting people easily cast off the shackles of worry, doubt, and cynicism because they envision a secure bond or a projected outcome ahead.
Conversely, lost trust is lost power. Suspicion and doubt are as leaks from the combustion chamber, bleeding potential power to unspecified, unwarranted places.
Perhaps you have heard the adage: “double-cross me once. . . your fault; double-cross me again. . . my fault.” Only the fool allows trust to be repeatedly betrayed; only the sick-minded will make a supreme commitment to someone or something that he doesn’t entirely trust.
This is why so many of us live in the doldrums. When trust has been broken, we live in perpetual despair; as human beings we are so inclined to give our hearts away to a person or cause, and yet we harbor so many suspicions of trustworthiness. We can no longer give our hearts wholeheartedly. Life loses its savor.
If these views seem too secular, if the obvious being stated doesn’t match up with the ideal of God’s justice and sovereignty over all things, I’ll honor that. We are warned not to trust even ourselves, after all, but finally to trust God.
Since Jesus told his listeners to turn the other cheek, to walk the second mile, to give the shirt off of your back, it appears that a guarded mindset or suspicious nature clashes with the will of Christ.
Then are we really expected to continue with those who have somehow betrayed us? The answer, it appears, is “yes”. Jesus did so, and to date I have not found any convincing evidence that he later rescinded or somehow qualified this idea.
But, as this stream of thought progresses, is everything as it should be because we have placed our trust in God? I find that question a lot more difficult to answer. We are admonished to be fools for Christ, yet I would argue that the responsible person finally accepts responsibility for involvements with the unreliable person, the wolf in sheep’s clothing, or the abomination of desolation standing in the holy place.
A friend once made the off-hand remark, “People are going to end up letting you down, no matter what.” Yes, no matter what; and then. . . what?
I think we have to begin with trusting God again; perhaps that was the very place where trust was first broken.
If we can get to that place of confessing and accepting “the lines have fallen to me in pleasant places” (Ps. 16), then we stand a better chance of being able to face anyone we feel has betrayed us. This is not the goal, mind you; it is only a possibility.
We still reserve the right to tell our double-crossers that their character is in question; Jesus did so, and so might we. We may also continue to keep double-crossers a ten-foot pole distance from our lives. After all we are not commanded to chum-up. We are only expected to submit our heart attitudes to the custodial care of the Holy Spirit, and if this leads us to reconciliation, so be it.
Either way lost trust is lost power. It is an enormous setback for any person or organization. Once trust is lost, it is a very slow and difficult procedure to patch or seal the leak. It may never be fully repaired. If we care at all about our lives, we would do well to maintain it.